下面是个乱编的东西。算笑话吧。声明，无特指，纯属虚构。

荫茎法子 in a gay bar

山豆凡/小凯


A stout Chinese lady named 荫茎法子 walked into a gay bar. She sat next to an Irish man. All patrons could tell she was rich and powerful, by looking at her wide waist line and up-upped chin. The brooch she was wearing had an imprinted line---hot like me.
“How do you do?” the Irish man greeted her.
“How do I do? Business as usual,” 荫茎法子 was scornful.
…
“You are so big,” he struck a conversation to break the ice.
“Size matters,” 荫茎法子replied.
“Are you gay?” he asked bluntly.
“It depends,” 荫茎法子paused, then continued, “Most of people I met suck. It really depends on who sucks the best.”
“Have you met any?” the man was curious about who the best sucker was.
“Oh yeah,” 荫茎法子grinned and sipped her drink with the straw between her plump lips, making a siren-like slurp, as if she was giving the most polite compliment to a Japanese noodle chef.

　　這是漢字簡化運動造成的混亂，混亂往往導致文字污穢。《現代漢語規範字典》（語文出版社，1998年1月）一律把“林蔭大道”、“樹蔭”給規範成了“林陰大道”、“樹陰”。那麼“林蔭道”該規範成甚麼呢？

蔭＝荫
陰＝阴

树荫要规范成树阴，此举当真？如果是，那我把98年的这个规范完全忽略/忽视了。我一直用林荫大道，或者树荫。阴凉和荫凉，是两个不同的概念。