标题: 《春晚即景》bilingual [打印本页]
作者: 海外逸士 时间: 2009-10-21 18:15 标题: 《春晚即景》bilingual
《春晚即景》
A Scene in a Spring Evening
老樹村前噪夕鴉﹐晚來燕子各歸家。枝頭舊綠間新綠﹐籬畔紅花雜紫花。
On an old tree in the village returned crows cawing
The swallows are back to respective homes in the evening
The old green is interlocked with the new green on the boughs
The red flowers mingling with the purple ones by the fence
作者: seity 时间: 2009-10-21 18:59
Originally posted by 海外逸士 at 2009-10-21 11:15 PM:
《春晚即景》
A Scene in a Spring Evening
老樹村前噪夕鴉﹐晚來燕子各歸家。枝頭舊綠間新綠﹐籬畔紅花雜紫花。
On an old tree in the village returned crows cawing
The swallows are back to respective homes in the evening
The old green is interlocked with the new green on the boughs
The red flowers mingling with the purple ones by the fence..
评（仿 海外逸士给别人的评语）
1. 村前不是村子里面，译错
2. returned 原文无
3. 归家--谁的家，还是燕子的巢
4. 枝头的头字没有译出
5. interlock 用错，interlock 暗示 deadlock/再也无法动弹，大错
6. "The red flowers mingling with the purple ones by the fence" 没有动词啊。
最终得分：D.
扣分理由：译文死气沉沉，毫无诗意。
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